The 2020 Halloween Special: "TERROR IN THE WAX MUSEUM"

Terror in the Wax Museum

Ben and Julian were enjoying an absinthe and smoked salmon platter in the 'Café De Richelieu', an exclusive French café in South Kensington. Ben gazed out of the window at the pouring rain:
"The first day that we leave isolation and travel to London and this awful weather happens. It's as if fate is conspiring against us Julian. It was bad enough that we had to endure a whole morning of Corinne's INSET on so-called 'blended working' strategies. That IT woman she brought in to do the talk was about as engaging as a walnut."
Julian laughed and stroked Ben's hand:
"But we do have the whole afternoon to explore South Kensington. Who cares about the rain? We are in one of the most exclusive and upmarket parts of London'.
Ben grinned and sipped his drink:
"Well we can do some exclusive shopping certainly. My wardrobe is getting rather tired and I simply must buy you something special'.

Later, as they left the café, the rain started pouring down harder and Ben and Julian sheltered under Ben's Harrods umbrella as they hurried down the street:
"This autumnal weather is vile. And the sky is so dark and sinister", Julian observed.
As they crossed over a side-street, Julian noticed a neon sign half-way down:
DR TERROR'S WAXWORK MUSEUM: ENTER IF YOU DARE
Julian grabbed Ben's arm:
"Hey that could be a laugh and would give us a break from this rain."
Ben frowned:
"Julian, that looks like a run down and rather sorry excuse for a museum. Hardly Madame Tussauds. Still I suppose it ticks the Halloween box and we could have some fun laughing at whoever runs it."
They laughed as they walked down the side street and entered the museum. Ben was surprised to see a twenty-something couple with ear piercings and trendy student clothing behind the ticket booth:
"Two entrance tickets please. I was hoping to meet 'Dr Terror' as we entered. The owner I mean. Is he inside dressed up as Dracula or something?" Ben asked. The young man frowned:
"We are like the owners. My name is Guidian and this is my partner Amelia. We bought this place like two months ago after the old guy who owned it died. Dr Terror was just a pseudonym he used. He was like some old Greek guy called Mr Popodopolis or something."
Ben sighed:
"How disappointing. So Dr Terror turned out to be about as terrifying as a cabbage leaf Julian. Oh well".

Ben bought the ticket and the young couple started showing them round. The museum stank of mould and the waxworks were in a dilapidated state with moth-eaten clothing. Julian was highly amused:
"Hey Guidian, Dracula seems to be missing one of his fangs. And the mummy seems to be about to fall apart".
Ben was less pleased:
"Some of these so-called waxworks seem to be made of plastic. Your Jack the Ripper for example. Pathetic. Why on earth did a young couple like yourselves buy this run down excuse for a museum?"
Guidian was annoyed:
"Look we bought this place to turn it into a club, okay. We are just like waiting to get the planning permission. We thought we could like keep the horror theme and some of the better exhibits. We don't get many visitors. You are the first in two days."
Julian laughed:
"I'm not surprised. Still this place is so awful its good for a laugh. For example what is this big, smelly, hairy thing that's looming down on me?"
Amelia walked up to him and pointed at the sign:
"As it says on here, this is a Yeti. We like thought of keeping this one for the club as its not really in that bad a condition."
Guidian approached:
"Yeah old Mr Popodopolis seems to have loved this one. He left us a bizarre note about it as well, something about not letting the sphere in the safe come into contact with it."
Ben, who had been gazing at the waxwork of Elizabeth Bathroy, had overheard and came running over:
"Hey, the sphere. Where is it now? Is it in your safe still?" he shouted.
Amelia looked anxious:
"What are you like shouting about. I took the thing out this morning and put it over there next to the Gorgon...... hey its gone!"
Ben stared angrily at her, his dark eyes blazing:
"You stupid girl, that sphere could have awakened this thing. It's a robot. It was controlled by the great intelligence, the Doctor told me all about it, back when we used to get on. Even if the intelligence is gone, that sphere could still have the power to reactivate that thing."
Guidian grabbed Ben by the shirt collars:
"Don't you call my partner stupid. What the hell are you on about?"
Ben pushed him off and the two were about to come to blows when Amelia shouted:
"Hey look, its like here ok. It had rolled behind the Gorgon. It's rubber. Just made of rubber. The Yeti is wax with a fur coating. We examined it."
Ben sighed:
"Oh well alarm over."
As he spoke, Julian shouted:
"Hey Ben, look!"
The plastic exhibits has suddenly started to twitch and move. Dracula and the Gorgon began to walk towards them, hands raised as if they needed to strangle. Jack the Ripper moved out of his setting, a large, sharp knife raised and ready to slice open Ben's throat. Amelia screamed and fainted as Ben grabbed Julian's arm:
"Oh my God, its the nestene. They're Autons. All the while I was worried about the Yeti when the nestene must be in London . Rose Tyler always said it would return."
They turned to run out the way they came but their path was blocked by two zombies carrying meat cleavers.
"Christ Ben, we're going to die", Julian shouted in an anguished state. The zombies moved in towards them and along with Jack the Ripper they raised their knives and...........






















........dropped the knives and tore off their plastic masks revealing laughing students. Amelia got up laughing and Guidian slapped a baffled and bemused Ben on the back:
"Well look mate, the sign did say 'Enter If You Dare'. Old Popodopolis had a great idea here employing students to scare the visitors by pretending to come alive. So we like bought the place and opened the club in the upstairs function room. We'll keep the downstairs going as a horror museum as its a great laugh."
Ben was bemused:
"Have you no idea how irresponsible and frightening that charade just then was?"
Guidian laughed:
"Hey chill mate, its just a laugh. We wouldn't have let you in if you were like old or something. "
Ben sighed:
"Does your club upstairs serve absinthe?"
"Oh yes, we've just got some Parisian Golden Eye Absinthe in, especially for Halloween" Guidian replied.
"Ok, well if Julian and I get a free drink then I may refrain from reporting you. Show us to the bar."

THE END